Expressing Anger

A commonality found in most “How to Deal with Anger” articles is advice on how to get rid of anger or how to let it go in the moment. It is important to remember that anger is a perfectly normal emotion. The problem is that most people express anger in an improper/harmful way. Being taught how to express anger openly, honestly, and appropriately is the goal.

Recite this “Anger Affirmation” to yourself to begin reframing your relationship with anger.

I express my anger openly. I tell others when and why I am upset. When others make me angry, they are entitled to know. If I am willing to share my negative emotions, it allows others to adjust their behavior accordingly so we can resolve the conflict.

I am honest with others about my anger. I avoid denying my emotions. I am strong enough to share my negative emotions with others.

I express my anger appropriately and calmly. I maintain control of my emotions, words, and actions. Expressing my anger inappropriately creates a lot of unnecessary drama. I avoid creating drama.

Before I react angrily, I stop and count to ten. Then I carefully consider why I am angry and share that reason with the other person.

I avoid saying things that only serve to make a disagreeable situation worse.

When someone is angry with me, I appreciate knowing why. Therefore, I afford the same courtesy to others. It is easier to work through conflicts when there is open communication.

Today, I choose to express my anger openly, honestly, and appropriately. I am in control of my emotions, even when explaining to others why I am upset. I know that being open is the first step to finding a solution. I am comfortable talking about my feelings.